After six months entertaining bizarre aliens on a space station, Leo MacGavin can’t wait to get home, where the people are, you know… people. But when an unfriendly wager promotes him from karaoke DJ to cruise ship captain, the future of humanity rests in his fumbling hands.

“Fantastic writing, funny but relatable characters in bizarre situations, and tight dialog. Sci-fi comedy at its best. Trust me on this. When this book comes out, you and I will be telling everyone, ‘I read Marcus Alexander Hart before he was famous.'”
– Julia Huni, author of Triana Moore: Space Janitor

Galaxy Cruise: Royally Screwed is the second uproarious adventure of the cruise starship WTF Americano Grande, featuring aliens in inflatable fat suits, a gladiator-style singles mingle, and a few very tasteful and understated poop jokes. 

“One of the funniest books I have ever read! […] I'd compare it to other popular works of SF comedy, but it's like nothing you've ever read before.”
– Tyler Aston, author of The Earth Warden Saga

Captain Leo MacGavin and the misfit crew of the cruise starship Americano Grande are back for another adventure. Expect more antics! More drama! Probably fewer poop jokes!

More details to be unveiled soon…

Pre-order Galaxy Cruise: Trial by Leisure!

Urg is a little zombie with a big problem. Someone stole his nose and used it to create a gang of goopy green ghosts on a snot rampage! To catch the thief and end the chaos, Urg teams up with ten-year-old genius Emilio Montanio and his hilarious pal Rochelle “Roach” Riggs. Together they uncover clues and question the local weirdos as they try to solve the mystery, stop the ghosts, and fix Urg’s face!

Urg the zombie is stuck in the world of the living until he can find his missing body part and go home. But how is he supposed to find it when he doesn’t even know what it is? Things get weirder when a big rock concert is ruined by hungry electrical vampires! The little monsters suck up all the power, plunging the whole town into a blackout! Can Emilio and Roach help Urg stop the vampires before Pootville goes dark forever?

It’s too scary to sleep when an army of smoky skeletons terrorizes the town! But who would want to keep everyone awake all night? Could it be the scheming bullies from Burpsburgh? Or the spooky film crew shooting a horror movie in the woods? Fueled with bellies full of jalapeno burgers, Urg, Roach, and Emilio will have to pull an all-nighter to crack this case. If they don’t, no one in Pootville will ever sleep again!

Under constant attack by scary monsters made with Urg’s lost zombie body parts, Emilio’s neighbors get guard dogs to protect their homes. But the puppies prove to be no match for an invasion of weird watermelon werewolves! When the furry green beasts kidnap the pets, Urg, Roach, and Emilio are the only ones who can get them back. But who is the melons’ master? The Zombie Reconstruction Squad needs to find out, stop the seedy savages, and fix Urg’s decomposing body once and for all!

The ghost of a dead teenage metalhead must use magic spells from an old sitcom to save the world from a paranormal apocalypse she might be kinda, sorta, completely responsible for unleashing.

“Hart harnesses rebellious teen spirit and adolescent angst into a breezy, amusing story featuring satisfying character growth and impressive descriptions of place. This subversive fantasy will appeal to fans of cringe comedy.”
– Publisher's Weekly

In a secluded hideaway, a family is trapped by an evil entity with an ultimatum: Two of them can leave the woods alive, but only after they murder the third.

Awarded Honorable Mention in the 2018 Writer's Digest Self-Published Book Awards. Complex and brutal family dynamics with a supernatural twist make this perfect for fans of Stephen King's The Shining or the Netflix series The Haunting of Hill House.

Amber's date with a cute blind guy turns into a madcap adventure full of drugs, guns, and a very pissed off waiter. Luckily she has her two best friends advising her on her Bluetooth earpiece. If only they could ever agree.

A fast-paced comedy told entirely through text messages, this one is like a cross between Lauren Myracle's Internet Girls books and a movie based on a Saturday Night Live sketch.

When a mild-mannered geek meets the girl of his dreams he turns to his blog followers for a crash course in romance. Because who ever went wrong following advice from strangers on the internet?

This book was written as blog posts in real time from 2004-2005. None of Ray Caster's online followers knew he wasn't a real person until the first edition of this book was published. Come for the story, stay for the social experiment!

Includes a free sample of Galaxy Cruise: The Maiden Voyage!

After six months entertaining bizarre aliens on a space station, Leo MacGavin can’t wait to get home, where the people are, you know… people. But when an unfriendly wager promotes him from karaoke DJ to cruise ship captain, the future of humanity rests in his fumbling hands.

When Krampus threatens Santa's life, the jolly old elf needs a magical bodyguard with focus, integrity, and ruthless efficiency.

What he gets is a slacker metalhead sorceress and her two dead friends.

In other words, Christmas is doomed.

Packed with magic gone awry, fast-paced antics, and occasional bouts of gratuitous violence, Alexis vs. the Merry Menace is an action-adventure Christmas comedy that remembers the true reason for the season.

Presents. The reason is presents.

Can a group of lusty misfits on a derelict spaceship fix their broken time machine, save the universe, and still manage to get in each other's pants?

Geeky, sexy, and relentlessly silly, this play reads like a production of Noises Off twisted with an episode of Red Dwarf.